Relationships & Connections Archive

Older couples who have fallen into a sexual rut can try to spice things up—and perhaps strengthen your relationship in the process—by reading erotica that caters specifically to older adults. Reading and listening to erotic stories as a couple lets both parties explore fantasies in a safe environment and create an exciting atmosphere by encouraging couples to venture outside their comfort zone. Besides reading aloud to each other, couples can read on their own and share the experience or listen to erotic audiobooks and podcasts together.

Having a sense of purpose is linked to important health benefits, such as longevity and sharp thinking skills. There are many ways to cultivate a sense of purpose. Ideas include thinking about one's strengths or skills and how to apply them; becoming a mentor; volunteering time to a worthy cause; reading Viktor Frankl's book Man's Search for Meaning; writing about lived experiences and sharing the information with family or friends; and thinking of longtime dreams and ways to achieve elements of them.

Staying socially active is associated with cognitive benefits and may play a role in longevity, stress reduction, and controlling mood. If a person has been out of touch with friends for a long time, one way to restart contact is to send a brief message asking how they're doing or recalling a shared activity. If the person reciprocates, the next step might be to suggest a meeting, ask to get together, or schedule a catch-up phone call or video chat.

Middle school can be challenging for many students, with increased time demands, more homework, and social situations to navigate. What can parents do to support their kids and strengthen family bonds during this period in their lives?

People who devote time to helping others are often happier than those who don't. Serving others also helps brain health by increasing social connections, which can protect against loneliness and depression, and improving executive function skills like planning, attention, and remembering tasks. Common ways to help others include volunteering, mentoring, random acts of kindness, and seeing life from another person's perspective.

Three group housing trends can help ward off loneliness and isolation in older age. One trend is specialized communities, which are private mini-neighborhoods that promote shared activities, involvement with neighbors, and sometimes shared goals (such as providing stable lives for foster children). The communities are run by the people who live there or by nonprofit organizations. Another trend is home sharing—taking on a boarder or sharing a home with friends. A third trend is residential care homes, which are small assisted living facilities in private homes licensed by the state.

Validation is a valuable communication technique that can help people feel heard and understood. When used correctly it helps us understand  another person's feelings and establishes trust, particularly in situations with heightened emotions.

Simple coping strategies like counting to 10 are often useful to help you avoid an outburst. But as multiple challenges in recent years have amped up stress levels, those strategies may not be enough. So what steps can you take to avoid reaching your boiling point?

Intergenerational friendships typically involve an older adult and someone who's 15, 20, or more years younger. Studies suggest people can benefit physically and psychologically from such friendships. Friends of diverse ages can expose people to different experiences, attitudes, and approaches. To create intergenerational friendships, people can use a shared workplace or activity as a springboard for deeper connection. They should show genuine interest in the other person's life and experiences.

Denial is a natural response at times when you're unable or unwilling to face the facts. As a defense mechanism, it can be helpful or harmful. Here's how to spot it in yourself and others, and how to move from denial toward meaningful change.