Relationships & Connections Archive

Super-agers are people who reach their 80s, 90s, or beyond with the memory capacity of someone at least three decades younger. As people get older, certain brain regions shrink, slowing brain functions. But super-agers retain more brain volume in areas linked to memory and movement, and their brains shrink more slowly over time. Women are more likely to be super-agers because they live, on average, longer than men. Genetics also appear to play a significant role in achieving super-ager status.

An active social life is good medicine for the body and brain as it lowers the risk for many chronic diseases and protects against dementia and mild cognitive impairment. However, people who are introverts and enjoy their solitude can struggle with engagement. These individuals can benefit from socializing while maintaining their comfort levels by engaging in activities like joining social clubs and other groups, taking classes, and attending public events.

Older adults might not think too much about how they want to spend their remaining years. However, some self-reflection can help them live their final years to their fullest. Asking themselves what is most important in five areas—relationships, health, education, personal growth, and recreation—can help people recognize where their passions lie. Once they discover which goals are most important, they then can begin developing plans to meet them.

In a 2025 study of about 2,000 people (average age 80) who were followed for seven years, about a third developed dementia or mild cognitive impairment. Being socially active seemed to delay that diagnosis for about five years.

Acts of kindness do more than make the giver and recipient feel good—they can also bolster psychological and physical health. Research suggests kindness can improve happiness and increase social connectedness as well as reduce anxiety and lower blood pressure. Evidence also suggests concentrating good deeds into shorter time periods enhances well-being more powerfully than spreading actions out. Kind acts can include complimenting people, running errands for a neighbor, making a donation to charity, and signing up to volunteer.

A portion of the two million Americans diagnosed with cancer each year choose to keep the news private or tell only a select few people. These patients may wish to avoid extra attention, sympathy, or different treatment; bypass burdening or alarming others; protect their job; feel in control of an uncertain situation; or sidestep judgment if their cancer is related to lifestyle choices. But opting for secrecy can pose several disadvantages, depriving patients of practical and emotional support and aggravating stress, anxiety, and depression.

Engaging in prosocial, altruistic behavior that benefits other people—such as doing volunteer work, giving money to charity, or performing small acts of kindness—may be beneficial to cardiovascular health. Possible mechanisms include reductions in stress and blood pressure. Volunteering has also been associated with improvements in heart-related risks, including increased step counts and less depression.

We can learn much from people who continue to live productive lives into their 80s and 90s. Doctors in this demographic have a unique perspective as they have the lessons from their decades of medical practice and their personal experiences dealing with Father Time. Here, two Harvard physicians — Dr. Marshall Wolf, 87, and Dr. Mitchell Rabkin, 94 — share lessons they've learned over the decades from their practice and personal life about how they keep their body and mind strong, healthy, and thriving.

Communicating with someone with dementia can be tricky, since their ability to understand others and express themselves fluctuates and declines. Certain communication strategies can help smooth interactions between caregivers and dementia patients. They include being an active listener, avoiding confrontation, agreeing with the patient's reality, removing distractions, using shorter sentences and smaller words, asking yes-or-no questions, using written lists and schedules, and incorporating touch.