For Parents & Caregivers > Mental Wellness Basics

Seeking Help

Are you worried about suicide?

Don’t be afraid to ask your child directly if they are thinking about suicide, and if they have the means to do it and a plan to follow through. Not sure how to start that conversation? Watch this Opens in a new tabvideo from and/or read this Opens in a new tabhandout from The Clay Center for Young Healthy Minds .

Suicidality should always be taken seriously. If your child has the intention, plans, or means to hurt themselves, call 911 or take them to the emergency department.

As many parents and caregivers know, it’s not unusual for a teen to be moody at times. But you may wonder if they are experiencing a normal period of transition, or if you should seek help for a possible mental health condition. The information below can help you decide.

Reasons you might ask for help for a young person

  • unusual moodiness, isolating more than usual, or losing interest in activities
  • behavioral changes including impulsivity, getting upset quickly, or engaging in risky or self-harming behavior
  • changes at school such as dropping grades, having difficulty concentrating, or interacting less with peers
  • sleep or energy problems such as low or very high energy, sleeping much more or much less than usual
  • hearing things others cannot hear, or saying that someone is trying to control their mind
  • excessive dieting, change in eating habits, or concern with weight
  • signs that they are thinking about harming themselves or others such as withdrawing from friends, saying goodbye, giving away important items, making a will, or taking dangerous risks like driving extremely fast.

To learn more about warning signs of a mental health condition, read this Opens in a new tabinformation from the National Institute of Mental Health or watch this Opens in a new tabvideo from NAMI  .

If your teen volunteers distressing feelings, show you’re open and willing to hear them through active listening and validation instead of minimizing or (unintentionally) dismissing what they share.

Where to find help for a young person

Pediatrician or primary care clinician
Mental health practitioner
Child's school
“Anyone can develop a mental health disorder no matter how wonderful the young person’s life may appear. It is not your fault, nor is it a failing of the young person.”

— submitted by a Parent

What to do in a mental health crisis

Learning about the skills of validation, co-regulation, and de-escalation can help you to calm and manage situations when young people become very emotional or heated. These skills can often keep a challenging situation from intensifying into a mental health crisis.

However, there are situations, often emergencies, in which a young person’s behavior may become so intense that caregivers find themselves in need of assistance. A mental health crisis is when a young person’s emotions and behaviors are extreme or out of control, or if they are at risk of hurting themselves or others. Here are ways to find outside, professional help:

If your child is in emotional distress, one option is to call or text the nationwide 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline for advice or chat at 988lifeline.org.

Depending on where you live, a Lifeline crisis counselor may be able to connect you with a local crisis support team for help. (Be aware that they may refer you to 911 if there is no local crisis support team.)

  • Voice, text, and chat options are available in English and Spanish. To connect with a Spanish crisis counselor:
  • People who are deaf, hard of hearing, or have hearing loss can choose to:
    • use their preferred relay service or dial 711, then 988
    • use the 988 ASL videophone service after agreeing to terms of service (see Opens in a new tablink) and clicking on their call link
    • text 988
    • chat on 988lifeline.org
  • Veterans can choose to:
  • People who choose to connect with an LGBTQ+-affirming crisis counselor can:
    • dial 988, then press “3”
    • text “PRIDE” to 988

If the young person is willing to go and it is safe for you to do so, take them to the emergency department (ED). In addition to accompanying them for support, be prepared to supply information such as:

  • health insurance
  • age and diagnosis if they have one
  • names and numbers of pediatrician or mental health provider
  • medications, doses, and allergies

It helps to have this information ready before a crisis hits. Store it on your phone, in your purse or wallet, or in a kitchen drawer.

Opens in new tab Download a template for a crisis plan from NAMI

Building your validation and de-escalation skills are your best preventive strategy to reduce the risk of a mental health crisis that may require calling 911. Reaching out to 911 is never an easy decision. Some people see the police as helpful and may count on them to provide assistance during a crisis. Others may see the police as intimidating and unskilled in managing a mental health crisis, and therefore likely to cause additional harm. However, if a young person’s behavior seems unsafe to themselves or others and beyond your ability to manage, calling 911 may be the right option. Here are some tips:

  • Tell the dispatcher that your child is having a mental health crisis. Explain the child’s mental health history and/or diagnosis.
  • Ask if your community has a crisis intervention team (CIT) officer or a children’s crisis team.
  • Ask for sirens to be off if that would be helpful for your teen.
  • When police arrive, remain calm, say, “This is a mental health crisis,” and provide as much helpful information as you can. You can then continue to support your child while police intervene, making sure to give them space to work with your child.

Seeking help for yourself: Prioritize your mental wellness

Paying attention to your own mental wellness matters, especially if you are caring for a young person struggling with mental health challenges. There are many ways to cope and engage in self-care, from seeking professional support yourself to finding space for much needed moments of calm and joy. Making time to fill your own cup allows you to better handle the challenges of caregiving.

Learn tools and ways to care for yourself
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Mental Wellness Basics

Learn what mental wellness is, why it’s important, and how to get help for yourself or your child.

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